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Relationships

One of the biggest areas of concern in my prepping is my relationships with others. By relationships I mean that people I am friendly with or are related to that are not aware or interested in my prepping. People that do not know what I have or what I intend to do after an event.

It is an area of concern for me because I have several different relationships that are a fine juggling act.

  1. My Close Family
  2. The people that I am prepping for. The fruit of my loins, I hope, and the investment I have made in the future. In my case they know what I am doing but not all the details and don’t believe there will be an event at all. I hope they are right. I have put aside as much as I can for this group and have left instructions on what they should do in the event of my demise.

  3. Close Friends
  4. These are a mixed bunch. Many know about my prepping, they certainly know about the hunting gear and the survival kits. Not all know about the water, food and equipment in the loft and none really know the location of the caches at the other sites. I have spoken to all of these over time to understand their opinion on prepping and most of them are not interested. One or two are prepping on their own and these will be welcomed into my group if it comes down to it. The others may be welcomed depending on the circumstances at the time.

  5. Neighbours
  6. None of the neighbours know what I am up to. Some know me as that strange person that has chickens, bees and a veg garden. The rest know me as the strange guy with the pallets and IBCs up the drive. I’ve carefully touched on the subject of prepping with all of them and a couple have commented that it makes sense to put something aside but only food and water. Don’t know if they have or not. We have not discussed it since. There are a couple here that may be welcomed depending on the circumstances at the time. The others won’t be.

  7. Other Preppers
  8. There are several preppers that I know that live locally. I’ve been careful but they know enough about me to find my location if they don’t know it already. There are a couple of preppers who live a bit further away that definitely know my address. With their mindset and, hopefully, preps they would be welcomed. The concern here is what extended family would they bring if they decided to come here? This is a risk but would have to be dealt with at the time and the risk would depend on what preps they had and the people they brought. I see it as an acceptable risk but still a risk. There are other preppers out there I know that I would welcome if it came down to it. It is part of the reason I set up the sites so you could get to know other like minded people. It is unlikely they would make the trip but you never know.

  9. Old Friends
  10. These are people I have met on my travels through life that know I am prepping. I’ve lost touch with them and most don’t know my current address but they do know where I have lived. I’ve lived in the same area since I was ten so they all know a location within a couple of miles of my current home. Not enough to find me after an event and I can’t see any of them heading this way before an event either but I can see them considering it but the non locals deciding that it is too risky and not making the trip. The locals might visit though so I need to consider what happens then as there are many that may be welcomed depending on the circumstances at the time.

  11. Extended Family
  12. None of these know what I am doing. They won’t even think of heading my way but they could easily think of going to some of my close family. This is the biggest area of concern for me because my close family could even invite them along when they come as planned. Most of these people I won’t even know but all are family to someone in my Close Family Group. Excluding them will not be easy as they will be supported by people within my Close Family. However I know for a fact I wouldn’t be able to consider even just the locals from my extended families. I just won’t have the resources.

  13. Really Far Away Family
  14. None know what I am doing and none live close enough to even consider me or my close family worth visiting. Maybe if they are here when something happens they would be have to be considered but the risk is low. Worry about that when the time comes.

So when I say welcomed I mean that I will find them a place close to me, remember I’m bugging in primarily, where we can be a close knit group and work together. I want to be in charge though, certainly for the start, although I’m not a dictator I don’t want people making decisions on my behalf. If they have preps them that is their stuff and if not I will make them work for any that come out of my stores.

When I say they are not welcome then I mean that I’ll be asking them to leave and if necessary I will use force to do that. I wouldn’t want to but I am prepared to do so. We could always use some extra compost if things go too far.

When I will consider people I will take into consideration who they are, what can they bring to the group, have they got preps, how much? What is their intent, temporary alliance or a long term commitment. All those as well as the situation itself will make a difference. The situation includes what the weather is like, it could be winter, what is the actual event? Is it long term or short term? There is a lot to consider.

It is the extended family that come visiting that is my concern. What when they refuse to go because someone has said they can move in with them. When that someone is saying I’ll share their food, food that I am providing in my families case. Handling this will have to be done at the time because depending on who it is, what the relationship is and the situation this could lead to it will make a big difference to how it is handled. Perhaps even getting them settled in and dealing with it on the quiet over a period of time. This is my fear as we have links to some large extended families spread over the larger local area but all within an hour of here by car. Hopefully it won’t come to that but I have considered how many and there is no way I can prep for that many.

5 comments to Relationships

  • bigpaul

    is always been said that “the less people you know the better off you will be” in an emergency situation, this has always been my belief. most of my family are deceased, married female cousin lives in a farm complex about 20 miles away and a half sister living near London. no friends living nearby, old friends live in a city nearly 50 miles away , they are not preppers and probably wont leave the city. neighbours don’t know i’m a prepper, none of their business, i’m just the old guy they see walking the little black dog every morning.

  • Northern Raider

    I concur with Big Paul for once, less hangers on, less extra mouths to feed connected to you by blood the ones you only see at weddings and funerals. I was a strong advocate of MSAs (mutual support agreements) linking preppers together in a network, but recent events have even proven them to be unworkable in practice. I hope to keep my preps 100% in family and among a couple of very close life long family friends. I made a rod for my own back in recent years and now regret those decisions so now though fare for being ideal I find looking inward to family for prepping is safer and more reliable.

  • Fred

    “When I say they are not welcome then I mean that I’ll be asking them to leave and if necessary I will use force to do that.”

    Of course, you could deal with them now – less trouble later. A bit like pre-crime.

  • midnitemo

    I know a number of preppers a couple on Anglesey and a couple locally , I’m not so keen on pooling my resources or joining up with another group/individual but I do like the idea of mutual support/trade with near neighbours , my group is in the main an ageing group so I’m open to introducing some carefully selected youth into the mix but this is fraught with “stranger danger” hangers on et al

  • Ysbryd

    My immediate family know what I do but my neighbours don’t. People visiting the house don’t get to see any of my preps and alterations. To be honest most of my preps look more green beardy weirdy to an outsider than survivalist. Nothing that I have done stands out as unusual in my area but I have fuel diversity, fruit and veg production, enhanced forage resources, private sewage, food and water storage, livestock and poultry etc.
    The first project that is overtly survivalist will be started this year and that will be a modest sized underground bunker based on the 1950’s observation bunkers spread across Britain. Once it’s finished it will appear to be two small concrete blocks (containing access ladder and ventilation plant) while the rest is sub surface. With the way North Korea is carrying on I wish I’d started it earlier.